Memories and Emotions
by SupernaturalDreamer87
Summary: The risk of broken bones aside, Sam had to ask...Tag to season 6 finale, *Spoiler Warning*


**Author's Note: **So another season of Supernatural has come and gone and surprise, surprise as soon as Lisa/Ben show back up so does my muse to write fanfiction. I'm not sure what it is about these characters and their relationship with Dean that intrigues me since they're are only a tiny part of what makes up this show and it's awesomeness , but I have to say that I am quite pleased with how Kripke and company chose to handle things at the close of this season. At the risk of breaking Sammy's nose, here's my take of Dean's reasoning behind the choices he made and their consequences.

**Memories and Emotions**

"Boy are you gonna play or sit there till Judgement Day?"

Dean glanced up from his cards and rolled his eyes at Bobby's bad pun. "I'm staging a comeback," he insisted.

"Well while you figure out which way you're gonna lose, I'm gonna go grab some more beer."

Dean watched as the older man exited what had been their home away from home since the angel formerly known as Castiel had absorbed the power of all those souls and was now claiming to be a God. Bobby's panic room seemed like the safest place to be while they plotted their next move.

Dean's eyes then fell on his younger brother, and Sam immediately glanced down to the book he had been 'reading', his face reddening.

"Sammy what is it? You're giving me your famous puppy dog stare."

The younger Winchester brother hesitated then set the book aside. "It's just...I still don't understand Dean. What you did with Lis..."

Dean cut him off. "Sam as happy as I am to have you back standing upright,sanity intact, I meant what I said: Say those names and you'll need facial reconstruction."

Sam held his hands up. "You loved them...and they loved you."

"What's your point?"

"They cared about you and now they don't know you exist."

"It's better that way, I can't hurt them anymore. They can move on with their lives."

"Fair enough...but there's one thing I'm not getting...you didn't ask Cas to wipe your mind clean of them. Dude, are you that masochistic that you think you deserve to torture yourself with their memory?"

Dean paused and for a minute Sam thought he was being ignored, then he cleared his throat.

"There's a country song called 'The Dance...Garth Brooks I think..."

"Country? You?"

Dean narrowed his eyes. "It has its moments, same as Bon Jovi, do you want to hear this or not?"

"Sorry."

"Anyway the song talks about the time you have with...someone you love going hand in hand with the pain you'll feel when you lose them. What I had with Lisa and Ben...it was the closest thing to happiness I've ever felt. Aside from Dad, you...and the guy that now owns my car," Dean added sheepishly tossing his cards on the table. "They're the only family I've ever had. I felt like I belonged somewhere for once in my life. I loved them, hell I'll always love them. I couldn't hurt them anymore, but I don't want to forget either...it made me happy to be with them. It's the same reason you want to remember your time with Jess, or why you wish you had memories of Mom."

"So you think it's fair to let them forget you and what you've done for them?. They loved you too.

"I know...but when I was down there with Ben... when Lisa was stabbed, he reacted the same way any eleven-year-old would in that situation, he was scared to death. Here his Mom was bleeding out in front of him and I was yelling at him to focus and barking orders at him like he was some trained lap dog. I was Dad...and not in a good way."

"You saved their lives."

"Maybe...but Ben deserves a Dad who remembers that he's just a kid. Someone who hasn't seen what we've seen and doesn't know what's out there. Now that they've forgotten me, maybe Lisa can find that person. I want them to be normal...and normal isn't with me."

Sam nodded, pretending not to see the tears that were glistening in brother's eyes. "I get it...but it's okay to miss them ya know?"

Dean sighed. "Emotions suck Sammy. They're like... Superman's kyptonite."

"Those emotions make us human Dean, trust me when I say you need to feel it."

"Whatever, are we done sharing and caring?"

Sam nodded.

"Good, now watch for Bobby while I check his hand."

Sam rolled his eyes and focused on the door.

**The End**

I own nothing, Supernatural belongs to the WB. Song mentioned is Garth Brooks: The Dance. Reviews are encouraged and very much appreciated.


End file.
